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Step Ten
"We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly
admitted it."
Through working the first nine steps, our lives have changed dramatically - way beyond
what we expected when we first came to Narcotics Anonymous. We've become more
honest, humble, and concerned about others, less fearful, selfish, and resentful. But even
such profound changes aren't guaranteed to be permanent. Because we have the disease
of addiction, we can always return to what we were before. Recovery has a price - it
demands our vigilance. We have to continue doing all the things we have been doing for
our recovery so far. We have to continue to be honest, to have trust and faith, to pay
attention to our actions and reactions and to assess how those are working for us or
against us. We also have to pay attention to how our actions affect others, and when the
effects are negative or harmful, promptly step forward and take responsibility for the
harm caused and for repairing it. In short, we have to continue to take personal inventory
and promptly admit our wrongs.
As you can see, the Tenth Step has us repeat much of the work we did in Steps Four
through Nine, though in a much-shortened format. The format suggested in this guide is
one that covers in a general way the elements of a personal inventory. Some of us may
find that we need to add questions that focus on specific areas that are affecting our
individual recovery to the questions already in this guide. We may find some additional
areas upon which to focus from IP #9, Living the Program. Our sponsor may have
specific direction for us on this point. As noted before, this guide is meant to be a starting
point, not the final word on any of the steps.

Why is a Tenth Step necessary?

What is the purpose of continuing to take personal inventory?

How can my sponsor help me?
Feeling versus Doing
We use Step Ten to create and maintain a continuous awareness of what we're feeling,
thinking, and, even more importantly, what we're doing. Before we begin a regular
pattern of personal inventory, it's imperative that we understand what we are assessing. It
won't do much good to make a list of our feelings without tying them to the actions that
they generate or fail to generate. We may often be feeling very badly though behaving
very well, or vice versa.
For instance, an NA member walks into her home group. "How are you?" someone asks.
"Terrible," she replies.
Of course, this member is referring to the way she feels. She can't possibly be referring to
what she's doing, because she is behaving very well indeed: She's going to a meeting,
honestly expressing how she feels, and reaching out to another member who will be
supportive.
On the other hand, we may be busy indulging our impulses and acting on character
defects. On the surface, we may feel very good. It usually takes a while before we notice
the emptiness that goes along with living this way. We're avoiding the work that will help
us stay clean. We're indulging our impulses, and taking the easy way out. And we know
where this will take us!
The Tenth Step will keep us aware of ourselves so we don't end up going to either
extreme. We don't have to beat ourselves up because we feel badly. We can instead focus
on the positive action we're taking. It may even turn out that by shifting our focus this
way, we'll wind up feeling better, too. Staying aware of what we're doing helps us see
patterns of destruction long before they become entrenched, so we don't wind up feeling
good at the cost of what's good for us.
We as addicts also tend to make judgments about what we are feeling. Anything that feels
bad we immediately want to stop. We often don't take into account that the way we're
feeling makes perfect sense when we consider the circumstances.
For instance, many of us have problems being angry. We don't like the way it feels. We
judge it, concluding we have no right to feel that way, and then we do our very best to
suppress our angry feelings. Yet, we may be experiencing a situation that would make
anyone angry. Perhaps we're in a relationship with someone who constantly fails to treat
us with respect. Perhaps we've been passed over for several well-deserved promotions at
work. Our response to these situations is anger. We've been treated poorly - of course
we're angry. Now comes the moment when our recovery can propel us forward into
greater self-respect or our disease can drag us down into a thick fog of depression and
resentment.
It all has to do with how we respond to our anger. If we scream and curse and throw
things, we'll destroy any possibility of making our relationship or job situation better. If
we do nothing and bury our feelings of anger, we'll become depressed and resentful, and
that won't improve our situation either. But if we take positive action aimed at improving
the situation, it may get better; at the very least, we'll know when it's time to leave and be
able to do so without regrets.
Sometimes the only thing we need to do with our feelings is feel them. We don't need to
react to them. For instance, if we've lost someone, we are going to feel sorrow. Our
sorrow may go on for a long time. It will lift when we've grieved sufficiently. We can't
afford to let our sorrow drag us down to the point where we can't go on with our lives,
but we should expect to be affected. We may be easily distracted or have a hard time
participating in activities that are supposed to be enjoyable. We need to strike a balance
between being in denial of our feelings and letting them overwhelm us; we don't want to
go to either extreme. This seems like a simple concept- almost as if it could go without
saying-but many of our members share that it takes years of recovery before we're able to
achieve a balance most of the time.
So the Tenth Step grants us the freedom to feel our feelings by helping us see the
difference between feeling and doing.

Are there times in my life when I am confused about the difference between my feelings
and my actions? Expand on this.
Right and Wrong
The Tenth Step tells us that we have to promptly admit when we're wrong. The step
seems to assume that we know when we're wrong, but the fact is that most of us don't-at
least not right away. It takes the consistent practice of taking a personal inventory for us
to become proficient at figuring out when we're wrong.
Let's face it. When we were new in recovery, we had been at odds with the rest of the
world for some time. As the Basic Text says, our "living skills were reduced to the
animal level." We didn't know how to communicate with others well. We began to learn
in recovery, but in the process1 we made a lot of mistakes. Many of us went through a
period of time when we became very rigid about the values we had developed in
recovery. We applied that rigidity not only to ourselves, but to everyone around us. We
thought it was principled and correct to confront those whose behavior was
"unacceptable." In truth, it was our behavior that was unacceptable. We were selfrighteous
and overbearing. We were wrong.
Or some of us, after years of serving as a doormat for everyone to walk across, decided
our recovery required that we become assertive. But we went too far. We demanded that
everyone treat us perfectly all the time. No one could have a bad day and fail to return
our phone call. No one was allowed to be emotionally unavailable to us for any length of
time. We angrily demanded perfect service at the places we did business. We weren't
being assertive. We were being immature and belligerent. We were wrong.
We can even end up being wrong if someone hurts us. How? Say our sponsor says
something very hurtful to us. Instead of taking it up with our sponsor, we talk to ten or
twelve of our closest friends at the next three meetings we go to. Before the week is
through, half our local NA community is talking about the rotten thing so-and-so said to
one of his sponsees -and that's if the story stayed as it was originally! So the situation
started out with us having done no wrong, but ended up with us being responsible for
damaging our sponsor's reputation in the program-the place where he needs, as much as
we do, to be allowed to make mistakes and recover at his own pace.

Have there been some times in my recovery when I've been wrong and not been aware of
it until later? What were they?

How do my wrongs affect my own life? Others' lives?
It's hard enough to figure out when we're wrong; admitting our wrongs can be even more
challenging. Just like in the Ninth Step, we have to be careful that we aren't doing more
damage by making the admission.
For instance, many of us realize we've hurt someone close to us-perhaps because the
person stopped speaking to us-but aren't quite sure what we said or did wrong. Rather
than taking the time to reflect on what we might have done, or ask the person, we decide
we'll just cover all eventualities and make a blanket admission. We approach the person
and say, "Please forgive me for anything I've ever, in all the time we've known each
other, done to offend you or hurt you.
The Tenth Step requires that we take the time for personal reflection for instances just
like this. Chances are that if we think about when the person's attitude toward us changed,
and think about our behavior immediately preceding that change, we'll know what we did
wrong. It might be painful or embarrassing to think about; it definitely takes effort, but so
do all the steps. Laziness is a character defect like any other, and we can't afford to act on
it. Then again, if we're truly stumped, if we just can't pinpoint anything we might have
said or done that was harmful, there's nothing wrong with approaching the person and
saying we've noticed that he or she seems to be angry or upset with us, that we care about
our relationship with that person, and want to hear what he or she has to say. Most of us
are afraid of what we'll hear in a situation like this, but we can't let our fear stop us from
working Step Ten.
There's another way we can render our admission of wrong completely ineffective: admit
we're wrong and then immediately point out what the other person did first that made us
act as we did. For instance, say one of our children used poor manners, so we yelled at
her and called her a name. Now when we admit we were wrong, if we tell our child that
her behavior made us act the way we did, we've just delivered a message that justified our
first wrong, thus making ourselves doubly wrong.
Unlike the process contained in Steps Four through Nine, when we go through events
from the past, Step Ten is designed to keep us current. We don't want to let unresolved
wrongs pile up. We need to try our very best to stay abreast of what we're doing. Most of
our work will be done by making constant adjustments to our outlook. If we find
ourselves becoming negative and complaining all the time, we might want to spend some
time thinking about the things for which we are grateful. We need to pay attention to the
way we react when we've done something wrong. Is it our first impulse to make an
excuse? Are we claiming to be victims of someone's negative influence - or of our
disease? All excuses aside, we are responsible for what we do. It may very well be that
our character defects got the better of us, but that doesn't excuse our behavior. We need to
accept responsibility, and continue to be willing to have our shortcomings removed.

"When we were wrong promptly admitted it" -what does this mean to me?

Have there been times in my recovery when I've made situations worse by talking to
someone before I should have or blaming my behavior on someone else? What were
they?

How does promptly admitting my wrongs help me change my behavior?
Step Ten points out the need to continue taking personal inventory and seems to assert
that we do this solely to find out when we're wrong. But how can we identify the times
we're wrong unless we also have times we're right as a basis for comparison. Identifying
the times we do things right and forming personal values are as much a part of personal
inventory as identifying our liabilities. Most of us have a very difficult time with the
concept of being right. We think of the times we vigorously defended an opinion because
we just knew we were right, but in light of our recovery, we've come to understand that
trampling over others in a discussion makes us wrong. Or we think of our personal
values. We know they're right for us, but if we began insisting that others live them, we
would no longer be right, but self-righteous. So how do we get comfortable with being
right? First and foremost, by working the Sixth and Seventh Steps so that our character
defects don't turn our positive acts into negative acts. Then, we have to realize that it will
probably take some time, and some trial and error, before we are completely comfortable
in our new lives in recovery.

Have there been situations in my recovery in which I felt uncomfortable about
acknowledging something I had done well? Describe.
How Often Should We Take A Personal Inventory?
It Works: How and Why tells us that while our goal is to maintain continuous awareness
of ourselves throughout each day, it's very helpful to sit down at the end of each day and
"work" this step. We need the consistency of doing something every day for it to become
a habit and to internalize the spiritual principles of the activity. As we stay clean and our
days of continuous abstinence turn into weeks and months and years, we'll find that
taking a personal inventory has become second nature. We'll find that keeping track of
our spiritual fitness comes naturally, without our having to think too much about it. We'll
notice right away when we're headed in a direction we don't want to go or about to
engage in a behavior that's sure to cause harm. We become able to correct it. So, the
frequency of our formal efforts to take personal inventory may depend on our experience
with recovery. In the beginning, some of us sat down at the beginning of our day, the end
of our day, or even both times and went through IP #9, Living the Program, or something
similar and "took our spiritual temperature." The point is that we want to keep at it until it
becomes a habit, until it's second nature to continuously monitor our recovery and our
spiritual state, notice when we're going off-course right away, and work to change it.

Why is it important to continue to take personal inventory until it becomes second
nature?
A Personal Inventory
The following questions address the general areas we want to look at in a personal
inventory. There may be times when our sponsor wants us to do an inventory on a
specific area of our lives, such as romantic relationships or our patterns at work, or our
sponsor may have specific questions to add to this. We should always consult our sponsor
on any step work we're doing.

Have I reaffirmed my faith in a loving, caring God today?

Have I sought out the guidance of my Higher Power today? How?

What have I done to be of service to God and the people around me?

Has God given me anything to be grateful for today?

Do I believe that my Higher Power can show me how to live and better align myself with
the will of that power?

Do I see any "old patterns" in my life today? If so, which ones?

Have I been resentful, selfish, dishonest, or afraid?

Have I set myself up for disappointment?

Have I been kind and loving toward all?

Have I been worrying about yesterday or tomorrow?

Did I allow myself to become obsessed about anything?

Have I allowed myself to become too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired?

Am I taking myself too seriously in any area of my life?

Do I suffer from any physical, mental, or spiritual problems?

Have I kept something to myself that I should have discussed with my sponsor?

Did I have any extreme feelings today? What were they and why did I have them?

What are the problem areas in my life today?

Which defects played a part in my life today? How?

Was there fear in my life today?

What did I do today that I wish I hadn't done?

What didn't I do today that I wish I had done?

Am I willing to change?

Has there been conflict in any of my relationships today? What?

Am I maintaining personal integrity in my relations with others?

Have I harmed myself or others, either directly or indirectly, today? How?

Do I owe any apologies or amends?

Where was I wrong? If I could do it over again, what would I do differently? How might
I do better next time?

Did I stay clean today?

Was I good to myself today?

What were the feelings I had today? How did I use them to choose principle-centered
action?

What did I do to be of service to others today?
What have I done today about which I feel positive?

What has given me satisfaction today?

What did I do today that I want to be sure I repeat?

Did I go to a meeting or talk to another recovering addict today?

What do I have to be grateful for today?
Spiritual Principles
In the Tenth Step, we will focus on self-discipline, honesty and integrity.
Self-discipline is essential to our recovery. When we were using, we were self-seeking
and self-absorbed. We always took the easy way out, giving in to our impulses, ignoring
any opportunity for personal growth. If there was anything in our lives that required a
regular commitment, chances are that we only followed through if it wasn't too hard, if it
didn't get in the way of our self-indulgence, or if we happened to feel like it.
The self-discipline of recovery calls on us to do certain things regardless of how we feel.
We need to go to meetings regularly even if we're tired, busy at work, having fun, or
filled with despair; we need to go regularly even when - especially when -we re feeling
hostile toward the demands that recovery makes on us. We go to meetings, call our
sponsor, and work with others because we have decided we want recovery in NA, and
those things are the actions that will help assure our continued recovery. Sometimes we're
enthusiastic about these activities. Sometimes it takes every bit of willingness we possess
to continue with them. Sometimes they become so woven into our daily existence, we're
hardly aware that we're doing them.

Why is the principle of self-discipline necessary in this step?

How can practicing the principle of self-discipline in this step affect my entire recovery?
The principle of honesty originates in Step One, and is brought to fruition in Step Ten.
We are usually nothing less than amazed at the range and depth of our honesty by this
point in our recovery. Where before we may have had honest hindsight, able to see our
true motives long after a situation was over, we are now able to be honest with ourselves,
about ourselves, while the situation is still occurring.

How does being aware of my wrongs (self-honesty) help me change my behavior?
The principle of integrity can be quite complex, but it is integrity, more than anything
else, that commands our ability to practice other principles. In fact, integrity is knowing
which principles we need to practice in a given situation, and in what measure. For
instance, we're standing outside a meeting one night, and happen to be part of a group
that begins gossiping about someone else in the program. Let's say they're discussing the
affair our best friend's spouse is having, and we know it to be true because we heard it
from our best friend the previous night. Knowing what to do in this situation will
probably take every ounce of integrity we possess. So which spiritual principles do we
need in this situation? Honesty? Tolerance? Respect? Restraint? It's probably our first
impulse to rush in, condemning the gossip because we know how much it would hurt our
friend to have such private matters discussed publicly. But by doing so, we may confirm
the gossip's truth and so hurt our friend more, or we may end up self-righteously
humiliating the people involved in the gossip. Most of the time, it isn't necessary to prove
we have integrity by confronting a situation we don't approve of. There are a couple of
things we could do in this situation. We could either change the subject, or we could
excuse ourselves and walk away. Either of these choices would send a subtle message
about our feelings, and at the same time, allow us to be true to our own principles and
spare our friend as much as possible.

What situations in my recovery have called on me to practice the principle of integrity?
How have I responded? Which times have I felt good about my response, and which
times have I not?
Moving On
One of the most wonderful things about the Tenth Step is that the more we work it, the
less we'll need the second half of it. In other words, we won't find ourselves in the wrong
as often. When we come to recovery, most of us have never been able to have any kind of
long-term relationship, certainly not any in which we resolved our conflicts in a healthy
and mutually respectful way. Some of us had raging fights with people and, once they
were over, never spoke of the underlying problems that caused the fights. Some of us
went to another extreme, never disagreeing at all with the people who were supposed to
be our closest friends and relatives. It seemed easier to keep our distance than to risk
creating a conflict that we may then have had to deal with. Finally, some of us just
walked away from any relationship in which conflict arose. It didn't matter how much we
were hurting the other person; it seemed easier than working through a problem and
building a stronger relationship.
The Tenth Step makes it possible for us to have long-term relationships - and we need to
have long-term relationships, especially in NA. After all, we depend on each other for our
very lives. Many of us feel deeply connected to the people who came to NA when we did
and have stayed around. We've done service work with one another, shared apartments
with one another, married one another, and sometimes divorced one another. We've
celebrated milestones in each other's lives: births, graduations, buying homes,
promotions, and recovery anniversaries. We've mourned losses together, and we've
comforted one another through the painful times in life. We've touched each other's lives
and formed a shared history. We are a community.
Along with learning to admit when we're wrong comes a freedom that is unlike any
we’ve ever experienced before. It becomes so much more natural for us to admit when
we re wrong that we wonder why we ever found it so terrifying. Perhaps because we felt
so "less than" in so many ways, an admission of a mistake felt like we were revealing our
deepest secret: our inferiority. But when we found out through working the steps that we
weren't inferior at all, that we had just as much value as anyone else, it no longer seemed
so crushing to admit we were wrong. We began to feel whole.

How does the Tenth Step help me live in the present?

What am I doing differently as a result of working Step Ten?
Working the Tenth Step makes it possible for us to achieve more balance and harmony in
our lives. We find that we're happy and serene much more often than not. Feeling out of
sorts becomes so rare that, when it does happen, it's a signal that something is wrong. We
can readily identify the cause of our discomfort by taking a personal inventory.
The personal freedom that has been building since we began working the steps yields an
increase in our choices and options. We have total freedom to create any kind of life we
want for ourselves. We begin to look for the meaning and purpose in our lives. We ask
ourselves if the lifestyle we have chosen helps the still-suffering addict or makes the
world a better place in some other way. What we are searching for, we'll find in the
Eleventh Step.
Step Eleven
"We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with
God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the
power to carry that out."
Step Eleven says that we already have a conscious contact with the God of our
understanding, and that the task before us now is to improve that contact. We began to
develop our conscious awareness of a Higher Power in Step Two, learned to trust that
Power for guidance in Step Three, and relied on that Power many times for many other
reasons in the process of working through the steps. Each time we called upon our Higher
Power for help, we improved our relationship with our Higher Power. Step Eleven
recognizes that reaching out to the God of our understanding, referred to most simply as
prayer, is one of the most effective means for building a relationship with God. The other
means put forth in this step is meditation. In this step, we will need to explore our own
concepts of prayer and meditation, and make sure they reflect our spiritual path.
Our Own Spiritual Path
The Eleventh Step allows us the opportunity to find our own spiritual path, or further
refine our path if we've already embarked on one. The steps we take toward finding or
refining our path, and the way we walk down it, will depend to a large degree on the
culture in which we live, previous experiences with spirituality, and what best suits our
personal nature.
Our spirituality has been developing since we first came to NA. We are constantly
changing, and so is our spirituality. New territory, new people, and new situations have
their effect on us, and our spirituality needs to respond.
Exploring our spirituality in the Eleventh Step is a wonderful and illuminating
experience. We will be exposed to many new ideas, and we'll find that many of these new
ideas come directly from our own knowledge of spiritual matters. Because we've
developed a frame of reference about spirituality in the previous ten steps, we find that
our insight has grown along with our capacity to comprehend new information about
ourselves and our world. Spiritual exploration is wide open, and we will learn and find
personal truths both in our concentrated efforts to understand more and in the most
mundane details of our lives.
Many of us find that when we get to NA, we really need to "change Gods." Some of us
believed in something we vaguely referred to as "God," but we didn't really understand
anything about it, except that it seemed to be out to get us. We probably did some work in
Steps Two and Three aimed at uncovering unhealthy ideas about our Higher Power, and
then we tried to form some new ideas that allowed for a loving, caring Higher Power. For
many of us, simply believing that we had a Higher Power that cared about us as
individuals was enough to get us through the following steps. We didn't feel any need to
develop our ideas any further.
But our ideas were developing anyway, even without our conscious effort. Each specific
experience with working the steps provided us with clues about the nature of our Higher
Power. We sensed truths about our Higher Power rather than understanding them
intellectually. The moment we sat down with our sponsor to share our Fifth Step, many
of us were suddenly filled with a quiet certainty that we could trust our sponsor, trust this
process, and go forward; this was a moment in which many of us felt the presence of our
Higher Power. This, along with the work we did in Steps Eight and Nine, implanted in
many of us a growing awareness of our Higher Power's will for us.

What experiences have I had with the previous steps or elsewhere in life that gave me
some inkling of what my Higher Power is like? What did I come to understand about my
Higher Power from those experiences?

What qualities does my Higher Power have? Can I use those qualities for myself-can I
experience their transformative power in my life?

How has my understanding of a Higher Power changed since coming to NA?
These clues about the nature of our Higher Power are perhaps the primary factor in
determining our spiritual path. Many of us have found that the spiritual path of our
childhood doesn't mesh with the truths we are finding within the steps. For instance, if we
sense that God is vast and open, and the spirituality we have been exposed to in the past
suggested that God was confined and confining, we're probably not going to return to our
earlier path. If we sense that our Higher Power cares in a very personal and individual
way about each one of us, a belief system that presents a distant, unknowable, alien force
may not work for us.
While some need to take a new path, others have found that just the opposite is true: that
what we are discovering in the steps can be explored in more depth through the spiritual
path of our childhood. It's possible that, through our step work, we've healed resentments
we may have held against religious institutions, and as a result are able to return to those
institutions with an open mind. For others, the religion of our childhood was little more
than a place to hang out, a community to which we had a sentimental connection. In
recovery, we begin to see how we can use our religion as our personal spiritual path.
It bears emphasizing that we should never confuse religion with spirituality. In NA, they
are not the same thing at all. Narcotics Anonymous, itself, is not a religion. It offers a set
of spiritual principles, and uses a concept referred to as "God," a "Higher Power," or a
"Power greater than ourselves" for members to use as a path out of active addiction. The
spiritual principles and the concept of a Higher Power can go along with a member's
personal spiritual path that he or she follows outside of NA, or those principles and the
concept of a Higher Power can serve as a spiritual path all by themselves. It's up to each
member.
Some of us get to this point, and we just don't know. The institutions we've been involved
with in the past hold no answers, but we can't think of anything that sounds like a better
idea. For those with this experience, this is the point at which we embark on one of the
most important journeys in our lives: the search for a way to understand a Higher Power.
In this process, we are likely to visit every place that has anything to do with spirituality
that's available in our community. We're also likely to read a great number of books
concerned with spirituality and personal growth, and talk to a great number of people. We
may commit for a time to any number of practices before settling on one - or we may
never really settle on any one practice permanently. It Works mentions that many of our
members adopt an "eclectic approach" to spirituality. If this applies to us, it's important to
know that doing this is okay and will serve the spiritual needs of recovery just fine.

Do I have a specific spiritual path?

What are the differences between religion and spirituality? What have I done to explore
my own spirituality?
As we explore our spiritual path, and perhaps pick up and discard various spiritual
practices, some of us are troubled by what seems to be an inherent bias in NA's steps and
traditions when God is referred to as having a male gender. Even more painful, some of
us may feel that we don't have much support within our local NA community for our
spiritual choices and exploration. It's important for us to understand that the language of
NA's recovery literature is not meant to determine a member's spirituality. It's also
important for us to understand that we as addicts have character defects, and sometimes
some of our members will act on theirs by ridiculing someone else's spiritual path. They
may even quote NA recovery literature to "support" such ridicule. Again, NA itself has
no "official" or "approved" spiritual path, and any member who claims otherwise is, quite
simply, wrong. We mention this here because we believe it's very important for all of our
members to know what's true and not true about NA when working the Eleventh Step. It
can be a dangerous time. If members follow a spiritual path, and feel unwelcome in NA
because of it, their recovery can be in jeopardy. We as members have a duty to encourage
the spiritual explorations of other members, and we who are exploring need to know that
we can look wherever we want for our spirituality without threatening our membership in
NA.

Have I encountered any prejudice in Narcotics Anonymous while exploring my
spirituality? How did that make me feel? What have I done to adhere to my beliefs?
It's essential that we don't let our spiritual path take us away from the fellowship. Our
Basic Text reminds us that "it is easy to float back out the door on a cloud of religious
zeal and forget that we are addicts with an incurable disease." We need to always
remember that we need Narcotics Anonymous m order to deal with our addiction.
Anything else we add to our lives can enhance their quality, but nothing can take the
place of NA recovery. As long as we continue practicing the basics of recovery - such as
going to meetings regularly, staying in contact with our sponsor, and working with
newcomers -- we shouldn't have to worry about drifting away.

No matter what spiritual path I am following, am I still keeping up my involvement with
NA?

How does my involvement in NA complement my spiritual journey?

How does my spiritual path contribute to my recovery?
Prayer and Meditation
Members of NA often describe prayer as talking to God, and meditation as listening to
God. This description has been part of the collective wisdom of NA for a long time
because it captures the distinct meanings of prayer and meditation so well. We are
building a relationship with our Higher Power, and we need to have a dialogue with that
Power, not merely a monologue aimed in its direction.
Prayer is talking to our Higher Power, though not always in the form of actual speech.
We worked on developing a form of prayer that felt right to us in the Second Step. We
may find by now that we've further refined our approach to prayer to fit with our spiritual
path. One of the forms of prayer in which virtually every NA member engages is the
closing or opening prayer said at most NA meetings. Ultimately, the manner in which we
pray is up to us as individuals.
How often should we pray? Many of us set aside a specific time in our day - the
beginning is fairly common-to pray. These prayers usually involve asking our Higher
Power for another day clean or, as we will explore more fully later in this chapter,
knowledge of God's will for us. When we communicate with our Higher Power at the end
of our day, it is usually to express gratitude. Many of us try to incorporate prayer
throughout our day. It is very good practice to pray regularly. It helps us form a habit of
communicating with our Higher Power that may save our recovery some day.

How do I pray?

How do I feel about praying?

When do I usually pray? When I am hurting? When I want something? Regularly?

How is it helpful to use spontaneous prayer throughout the day? How does prayer help
me put things in perspective?
If this is our first experience with the Eleventh Step, we may be surprised to learn we've
already been meditating, and doing so on a regular basis. Each time we stand as a
community at a meeting and observe a moment of silence, we are meditating.
It is from such beginnings that we go on to build a pattern of regular meditation. There
are many different ways we can go about meditating, but its usual goal is to quiet the
mind so that we can gain understanding and knowledge from our Higher Power. We try
to minimize distractions so that we can concentrate on knowledge arising from our own
spiritual connection. We try to be open to receiving this knowledge. It's essential that we
understand that such knowledge is not necessarily, or even usually, immediate. It builds
in us gradually as we continue to practice regular prayer and meditation. It comes to us as
a quiet sureness of our decisions and a lessening of the chaos that used to accompany all
our thoughts.

How do I meditate?

When do I meditate?

How do I feel about meditating?

If I have been meditating consistently for some time, in what ways have I seen changes in
myself or my life as a result of meditating?
Conscious Contact
To many of us, "conscious contact" sounds like something very mysterious, implying
some kind of cosmic union with God. But it's really very simple. It just means that we
have a conscious awareness of our link to a Higher Power. We notice the presence of that
Power, and see some of the ways it works in our life. There are so many ways our
members have experienced the presence of a loving God: when we experience something
in nature, such as a forest or an ocean; through the unconditional love of our sponsor or
other NA members; through the feeling of being anchored during difficult times; through
feelings of peace and warmth; through a coincidence that later on we see having led to
some great good; through the simple fact of our recovery in NA; through our ability to
listen to others at a meeting; and countless other means. The point is that we are looking,
and we are willing to acknowledge that our Higher Power is active in our lives.

In what circumstances do I notice the presence of my Higher Power? What do I feel?

What am I doing to improve my conscious contact with the God of my understanding?
God's Will
The knowledge that has been building in us as we've prayed and meditated is the essence
of God's will for us. The whole purpose of praying and meditating is to seek knowledge
of a Higher Power's will for us and, of course, the power to carry it out. But the first thing
to do is to identify God's purpose for our lives.
It takes a large amount of open-mindedness to begin to understand God's will for us.
Many of us find that it is easier to identify what is not God's will for us than what is. This
is absolutely fine; in fact, this is a great starting point that can lead us to more specific
knowledge of God's will for us. First of all, and obviously, it is not God's will for us to
relapse. We can extend this simple fact to conclude that acting in ways that might lead us
to relapse are also not God's will for us. We don't need to become overly analytical about
this and start questioning whether our daily routines could possibly lead to us relapsing;
it's really much easier than that. We use all of the knowledge about ourselves and our
patterns that we gained from the work we did in Steps Four through Nine, and we try our
very best to avoid destructive patterns. We'll discover that we no longer have the luxury
of consciously acting out. We can't deal with a situation by thinking, "Oh, I'll just be
manipulative this one time, and then I'll write about it later, work with my sponsor, and
make amends." If we do such a thing, we're not only on very dangerous ground, we're
making a conscious and deliberate decision to go against God's will. There will be many,
many times when we act on defects unconsciously. It is our consciousness and
willingness to be deliberately destructive in this situation that is the real cause for
concern.
In the Third Step, we explored the fine line that divides humble and honest pursuit of our
goals from subtle manipulation and forced results. Now, with the experience we have
gained in the intervening steps, we are much better equipped to spot that line and stay on
the right side of it. As we go after the things we want, we need to continuously gauge our
distance from that line. For instance, we may decide we want to be in a romantic
relationship. There's nothing wrong with that, provided we are spiritually motivated and
keep track of the line between God's will and self-will. If we lie to make ourselves seem
more attractive, or become chameleons, we're acting on self-will. If we honestly express
who we are, we're more likely to be pursuing God's will. If we're trying to change our
potential partner in a relationship into something he or she is not, we're acting on selfwill.
If, on the other hand, we've already determined what we want in a partner and the
person we're seeing seems to be matching that vision without our intervention, we're
probably living in God's will. That's how we tell whether a relationship is God's will for
us or not. Or say we want a college education. Are we willing to cheat on a test to get it?
Doing such a thing would turn an otherwise worthy goal into an act of self-will. The
avoidance of acting on self-will is the primary reason we pray only for knowledge of
God's will for us and the power to carry that out.

What are some situations I can identify from my own life where I acted on self-will?
What were the results?

What are some situations I can identify from my own life where I tried to align my will
with God's will? What were the results?
As it says in It Works: How and Why, "God's will for us is the ability to live with dignity,
to love ourselves and others, to laugh, and to find great joy and beauty in our
surroundings. Our most heartfelt longings and dreams for our lives are coming true.
These priceless gifts are no longer beyond our reach. They are, in fact, the very essence
of God's will for us." Our personal vision of God's will for us is revealed in how our lives
might be if we were consistently living with purpose and dignity. For instance, it is a
good expression of purpose to help others stay clean and find recovery. The individual
ways we go about doing that - sponsorship, sharing with newcomers at meetings,
carrying the message into institutions, working with professionals to develop programs
that will lead addicts to NA - are our choice.

What are some examples of how I live with purpose and dignity? What is my vision of
God's will for me?
The Power to Carry That Out
In addition to praying for knowledge of God's will for us, we're also asking for the power
to carry out that will. In this context, power doesn't refer only to forceful qualities. There
are many different qualities we may need to carry out our Higher Power's will: humility,
a sense of compassion, honesty, integrity, or an ability to persevere and the patience to
wait for results over a long period. A strong sense of justice and an ability to be assertive
might be what's called for in a certain situation. Sometimes eagerness is required, and
other times only a sense of caution will do. Courage and fortitude are qualities that we
will often be called upon to display. Sometimes, the best quality to promote God's will is
a sense of humor.
Most likely we will need all of these qualities at various times in our lives. When we pray
for the power to carry out God's will for us, we probably won't know exactly what
qualities we need. We have to trust that the ones we need will be provided. It may be
tempting for us to demand from our Higher Power the things we think we need, but we
usually can't see the "big picture" or the long-term effects of something that seems very
reasonable at the moment.

Why do we pray only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out?
How does humility apply to this?
Spiritual Principles
In the Eleventh Step, we will focus on commitment, humility, courage, and faith.
We need to make a commitment to the practice of regular prayer and meditation. Many of
us find that our first experiences with prayer and meditation have us feeling kind of silly.
We glance around the room to see if anyone is looking, and wonder just what we're
supposed to be feeling, anyway. As we continue with our commitment, this feeling will
pass, as will the consuming feelings of frustration when the results aren't what we expect,
and the boredom that sets in when the things we're doing become routine. The point is
that we need to continue, no matter how we feel about it. The long-term results of peace
of mind and a deeper relationship with our Higher Power are worth waiting for.

How do I show my commitment to working the Eleventh Step and to my recovery?

Have I prayed and meditated today?
The often-heard warning to "Be careful what you pray for!" captures the kind of humility
we need to practice in this step. We simply need to acknowledge that we don't always
know what's best for us - or for anyone else. That's why we ask for knowledge of God's
will for us.

Have I ever prayed for a specific thing and then wished I didn't have it after all? Expand
on this.
There's nothing that requires as much courage as trying to live according to our Higher
Power's will when there's frequent pressure not to. Not everyone in our lives will be
delighted that we've chosen to live our lives in a spiritual way. We may have family
members who are used to us living according to their will and want us to continue. Our
growth threatens them.
Or say we're with some friends who are gossiping. Our efforts to live the program have
resulted in us becoming uncomfortable with participating in gossip, yet we don't want to
be self-righteous and start moralizing with our friends. Merely refraining from
participating in something like this requires courage. We may lose some friends as we
grow spiritually.
Almost all of us face some situation in life where we are either being asked to participate
in something that is morally reprehensible or just keep quiet about it and allow it to
happen. It may be that the truly courageous course of action is to protest loudly, and
doing so may have severe consequences for us. What we do at such a time is a defining
moment, and may very well affect the choices we make for the rest of our lives.

Have I ever been faced with a situation that required me to stand up for my beliefs at
some personal cost? How did I respond? What were the results?
The principle of faith will help us to practice the principle of courage and live our lives
with integrity. We need not be so afraid of losing friends or having relationships change
or even having our lives profoundly affected because we know that we're being cared for.
We have faith that if we have to let go of old friends because what they're doing is
unhealthy for our spiritual development, we'll form new relationships with people whose
values we share. Basically, we need to have faith that we'll be given the power to carry
out our Higher Power's will.

Have I, so far, been given what I need? What have I received?
Moving On
Our practices in this step show up in every area of our lives. From the regular practice of
meditation, we may notice that we are able to listen more attentively to what others have
to say in meetings. We have some experience with quieting our minds and so are able to
do so in many places. We no longer find ourselves so consumed with planning what we'll
say when it's our turn that we are unable to listen to others.
We begin to be satisfied with our lives. We no longer feel such an urgency to control
things. We're focused on a higher purpose instead of on ourselves. Our regrets begin to
disappear. Our active addiction no longer seems like such a tragedy and a waste as we see
how we can use that experience to serve a higher purpose: carrying the message to the
addict who still suffers. In Step Twelve, we will explore some ways of doing that, and see
how practicing the principles of recovery are essential to such an effort.
Step Twelve
"Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this
message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."
If we've made it to this point, we've had a spiritual awakening. Though the nature of our
awakening is as individual and personal as our spiritual path, the similarities in our
experiences are striking. Almost without exception, our members speak of feeling free, of
feeling more light-hearted more of the time, of caring more about others, and of the everincreasing
ability to step outside ourselves and participate fully in life. The way this looks
to others is astonishing. People who knew us when we were in our active addiction, often
appearing withdrawn and angry, tell us that we're different people. Indeed, many of us
feel as if we've begun a second life. We know the importance of remembering where we
came from, so we make an effort not to forget, but the way we lived and the things that
motivated us seem increasingly bizarre the longer we stay clean.
The change in us didn't happen overnight. It happened slowly and gradually as we
worked the steps. Our spirits awakened a bit at a time. It became increasingly more
natural for us to practice spiritual principles and increasingly more uncomfortable to act
out on character defects. Notwithstanding the powerful, one-of-a-kind experiences some
of us have had, we've all slowly and painstakingly built a relationship with a Power
greater than ourselves. That power, whether it's our own best and highest nature or a
force outside ourselves, has become ours to tap into whenever we want. It guides our
actions and provides inspiration for our continued growth.

What is my overall experience as a result of working the steps?

What has my spiritual awakening been like?

What lasting changes have resulted from my spiritual awakening?
Each time we work through the Twelve Steps we will have a different experience.
Subtleties of meaning for each of the spiritual principles will become apparent, and we
will find that as our understanding grows, we are also growing in new ways and in new
areas. The ways in which we are able to be honest, for instance, will expand along with
our basic understanding of what it means to be honest. We will see how practicing the
principle of honesty must first be applied to ourselves before we are able to be honest
with others. We will see that honesty can be an expression of our personal integrity. As
our understanding of the spiritual principles grows, so will the depth of our spiritual
awakening.
Which spiritual principles have been connected to which steps, for me, and how have
those contributed to my spiritual awakening?

What does the phrase "spiritual awakening" mean to me?
We Tried To Carry This Message
Many of us recall the first time we heard the words, "You never have to use again if you
don't want to." For many of us, hearing this message was shocking. Perhaps we'd never
thought in terms of "having" to use before, and were surprised to find out just how much
truth that statement held. Of course, we thought, using drugs ceased to be a choice for me
a long time ago. Although just hearing this message may or may not have resulted in us
immediately getting clean, we still heard the message. Someone carried it to us.
Some of us had the experience of believing that we could stay clean in NA, but when it
came to recovery, that seemed beyond us. Gaining a sense of self-respect, making
friends, being able to carry ourselves out in the "real world" without it being obvious that
we were addicts all seemed like more than we could actually expect from NA. The day
we began to believe that this program could do more for us than just help us stay clean
was a tune we remember as a turning point in our recovery. What happened to give us
that sense of hope was that someone gave us a reason to believe. Maybe it was someone
sharing at a meeting with whom we identified in a very personal way. Maybe it was the
cumulative effects of hearing many addicts share that recovery was possible. Maybe it
was the unconditional love and quiet insistence of our sponsor that we could recover. In
whichever way we heard it, it was the message, and someone carried it to us.
Some of us have the experience of staying clean for a long time and finding joy in
recovery. Then we experience a tragedy. Maybe it's the breakup of a long-term
committed relationship or the death of a loved one. Maybe it's the relapse and death of
someone with whom we have been friends in NA. Maybe it's that we find ourselves
destitute. Maybe it's simply that we've realized that other NA members aren't perfect, and
so they're capable of hurting us. Because of whatever crisis we've experienced, we find
that we've lost our faith. We no longer believe that NA holds the answer for us. The
bargain we thought we had made-we'd stay clean and try to do the right thing and,
consequently, our lives would be happy - had been breached, and we were left wondering
about our purpose m life all over again. At some point, we began to believe again. Maybe
someone who had been through the same crisis reached out to us and helped us through
in a way no one else could have. Again, someone carried the message to us.

What are the different ways in which I've experienced the message?
So the message can be broken down very simply. It is that we can stay clean, that we can
recover, that there is hope. Recalling the times when we heard the message personally
will provide part of the answer to why we should now carry the message, but there is
more.
"We can only keep what we have by giving it away." This saying is perhaps the most
powerful reason we can present for carrying the message. Many of us wonder, though,
exactly how this concept works. It's simple, really. We reinforce our recovery by sharing
it with others. When we tell someone that people who go to meetings regularly stay
clean, we are more likely to apply that practice to our own recovery. When we tell
someone that the answer is in the steps, we are more likely to look there ourselves. When
we tell newcomers to get and use a sponsor, we are more likely to stay in touch with our
own.
There are probably at least as many ways to carry the message as there are recovering
addicts. Greeting a newcomer that we met at the previous night's meeting and
remembering his or her name is powerful and extraordinarily welcoming to an addict
who feels alone. Opening a meeting makes sure there is a place for the message to be
carried. Taking on a service position in any capacity helps keep NA itself going, and we
can do a great deal of good if we approach our service to the fellowship in a caring,
loving, and humble way. Sponsoring other addicts brings to life the therapeutic value of
one addict helping another.

What kind of service work am I doing to carry the message?
Sometimes it's challenging to carry the message. The person with whom we've decided to
share the message seems unable to hear it. This can range from someone who keeps
relapsing to someone who keeps choosing destructive behavior. It's tempting to think that
our efforts are being wasted and we should just give up on such a person. Before we
make such a decision, we should think about all the mitigating circumstances. Say we're
sponsoring someone who just isn't following our direction. We've suggested a writing
assignment, and we don't hear from the person again until a fresh crisis is brewing. We've
shared, with all the enthusiasm we can summon, about our own experience with the
situation the person is facing, explaining in great detail how our disease was present and
how we used the steps to find recovery, but our sponsee keeps doing the same destructive
thing over and over again. This can be very frustrating, but before we give up, we need to
remember that our choice isn't whether to carry the message, but how?
We need to get our own egos out of the way. We don't get to take credit-or blame-for
someone else's recovery. We simply present the message as positively as we can, and
remain available to help when we're asked. We also need to remember that we can't
possibly know what's going on in another person's mind or spirit. Our message may seem
to be missing its mark, but perhaps the person just isn't ready to hear it today. It may be
that the words we spoke will stay with a person for a long time and may resurface at
exactly the right moment. If we think about it, we can all recall things we heard NA
speakers say when we were new that we didn't understand at the time, but which rose up
in our minds years later and gave us reason to hope or a solution to a problem we were
experiencing. We carry the message, and we share it freely, but we cannot ever force
another person to get the message. The principle that applies to our fellowship's public
relations policy-attraction, not promotion-applies very well to our personal efforts to
carry the message, too.
It may also be the case that we're not the best person to sponsor someone. Individuals
have different needs and learn in different ways. Some people may thrive with one
sponsor but not do well with someone who has a different sponsorship style. Some
sponsors give a lot of writing assignments. Some are very insistent about their sponsees
going to a certain number of meetings. Some are very "proactive," while others may
simply respond to a sponsee's stated needs. No type is better or worse than any other.
They're just different.
Another time we might find it very hard to carry the message is when we're not feeling
very positive about life or recovery. It's probably our first impulse to go to a meeting and
dump all our problems out so we can purge them from our own spirits. But NA meetings
exist to provide a place to carry the message. Dumping our problems without tying them
to recovery or trying to make it clear what the message is doesn't further the primary
purpose of our groups. We can carry the message even if we just point out that we're
having terrible problems but are not using over it and that we're attending a meeting and
reaching out to work on our recovery. In most cases, though, the best way to carry the
message is to focus on the newcomers in the room and tell them what's good about
recovery in Narcotics Anonymous. We should also keep in mind that sometimes, no
matter how long we've been clean, we need to hear the message, and if we sit quietly in a
meeting, we have a good chance of doing so.

What are some different ways of carrying the message? Which ones do I personally
participate in?

What is my personal style of sponsorship?

What is the difference between attraction and promotion?

What does it do for me to carry the message?

How are the Fifth Tradition and the Twelfth Step tied together?

What keeps me coming back and trusting the NA program? What is selfless service?
How do I practice it?
To Addicts
Why does the Twelfth Step specify that we carry the message to addicts? Why did NA
work for us when nothing else had? Almost every one of us had someone - a teacher, a
counselor, a family member, a police officer - tell us that using drugs was killing us and
destroying all we cared about, that if we just stayed away from our using friends and
otherwise limited our access to drugs, we'd be able to change our lives. Most of us
probably even agreed on some level, unless we were in complete denial. So why couldn't
we find relief until we found Narcotics Anonymous? What did those other NA members
have that made us believe recovery was possible?
In a word: credibility. We knew that they, who were just like us, had stopped using and
found a new way to live. They didn't care what we had or didn't have. It even said in the
readings we heard at the beginning of the meeting that it didn't matter what or how much
we used. Most of us were grateful to find out that we qualified. We knew we'd suffered
enough, but we wanted to be accepted. And we were. The addicts who were there for us
when we first started coming to meetings made us feel welcome. They offered their
phone numbers and encouraged us to call any time. But what we really found important
was the identification. Members who had used just like we did shared their experience
with getting clean. Members who knew from personal experience exactly how isolated
and alone we felt seemed to know instinctively that a simple, loving hug was what we
needed. It seemed as if the whole group knew exactly what we needed without us having
to ask.
We often say to one another that we're fortunate to have this program; it gives us a way to
cope with life on life's terms. After we stay clean for a time, we realize that the principles
of Narcotics Anonymous are actually completely universal and could probably change
the world if everyone practiced them. We may begin to wonder why we don't open up
NA to all those who have any kind of problem. As we learned from our predecessors,
having a single purpose is probably one of the most effective ways of ensuring that the
opportunity will remain for an addict to find the identification he or she needs. If NA
tried to be all things to all people, an addict might walk in, wanting only to know how to
stop using drugs, and not be able to find anyone who knew.

Why was an NA member able to reach me in a way that no one else ever had? Describe
the experience.

What is the therapeutic value of one addict helping another?

Why is identification so important?
We can't be all things to all people; we shouldn't even try. This doesn't mean, however,
that we can't share our recovery with others. In fact, we won't be able to help it. When we
live a program, the results show up in every aspect of our lives.
Practicing These Principles in All Our Affairs
When we talk about practicing the principles of recovery in all our affairs, the key word
is "practice." We just need to keep trying to apply spiritual principles to our lives, not be
able to do it perfectly in every situation. The spiritual benefits we derive from working
this step depend on our effort, not our success.
For instance, we try to practice the principle of compassion in every situation in our lives.
It's probably relatively easy to practice the principle of compassion with a still-using
addict who has just walked into her first NA meeting, no matter how belligerent or needy
that newcomer is. But what about someone who has just returned from a relapse, or a
multiple relapser? What if he walks in blaming NA for his relapse? What if she casually
walks back into the rooms projecting an attitude that seems to take recovery for granted?
What if it's someone we sponsored? We may find that practicing the principle of
compassion doesn't come as easily as it used to. We don't feel compassionate toward the
person, but we can still practice the principle of compassion. All we have to do is
continue to carry the message without conditions. Our sponsor can help us learn how to
be compassionate without giving the impression that we think relapsing is okay. We can
pray and meditate, asking our Higher Power to help us be compassionate.
This step calls upon us to practice principles in all our affairs. Many of us would like to
separate our careers, our romantic relationships, or another area of our lives from this
requirement because we're not sure we can get what we want if we have to practice
spiritual principles. For instance, it may very well lead to apparent success and financial
reward if we compromise our principles at work. We may be asked to meet a production
deadline that results in profits for the company but produces an inferior product that
could compromise the safety of the people who purchase it. So what do we do? We
practice the spiritual principles of our recovery. There are probably many different
choices about the specific action to take in response to our principles; the important thing
is that we respond to our principles.
What about NA service? Strangely enough, some of us reserve NA service as the one
place where we forget our principles. We cease giving people the benefit of the doubt in a
service setting. We openly accuse others of hatching plots, and we say cruel things
because we're not practicing the principle of kindness. We set up impossible processes
for those we elect to do a job because we're not practicing the principle of trust. We
become self-righteous, belligerent, and sarcastic. It's ironic that we seem to want to attack
those whom we trust with our very lives in recovery meetings. We need to remember to
practice spiritual principles in any meeting, whether service or recovery. Service gives us
many opportunities to practice spiritual principles.
Knowing which spiritual principle to practice in any given situation is difficult, but it is
usually the opposite of the character defect we would normally be acting out on. For
instance, if we feel compelled to exert absolute control over a situation, we can practice
the principle of trust. If we would usually be self-righteous in a certain situation, we can
practice the principle of humility. If our first impulse is to withdraw and isolate, we can
reach out instead. The work we did in the Seventh Step on finding the opposites of our
character defects and the work we did at the beginning of this step on identifying the
spiritual principles in the previous steps will give us some additional ideas about the
principles we need to practice. Though most of us will wind up with very similar lists of
spiritual principles, the attention we devote to certain ones will reflect our individual
needs.

How can I practice principles in the different areas of my life?

When do I find it difficult to practice principles?

Which spiritual principles do I have a particularly hard time practicing?
Spiritual Principles
Even in the step that asks us to practice spiritual principles, there are specific principles
connected to the step itself. We will focus on unconditional love, selflessness, and
steadfastness.
Practicing the principle of unconditional love in the Twelfth Step is essential. Nobody
needs love without conditions more than a suffering addict. We don't ask anything of the
people to whom we are trying to carry the message. We don't ask for money. We don't
ask for gratitude. We don't even ask that they stay clean. We simply extend ourselves.
This doesn't mean we shouldn't take reasonable precautions. If we believe it isn't safe to
bring a suffering addict to our home, we shouldn't do it. Twelfth Step calls should always
be done with another NA member. Nor does practicing the principle of unconditional
love require that we allow ourselves to be abused. Sometimes the best way of loving and
helping is to stop enabling someone else to use.

How am I practicing the principle of unconditional love with the addicts I am trying to
help?
Why do we carry the message? Not to serve ourselves, even though we benefit. We carry
the message to help others, to help them find freedom from their addiction and grow as
individuals. If we have an attitude that the people we sponsor are somehow our
possessions, that their lives would fall apart if we were not directing their every move,
that most likely they wouldn't even be clean without us, then we've missed the point of
the Twelfth Step. We don't expect recognition for the number of sponsees we have or for
how well they're doing. We don't expect recognition for being of service. We do these
things to accomplish something good.
It's a great paradox that selfless service becomes an expression of our deepest selves.
Through our work in the previous steps, we have uncovered a self that cares more about
allowing a Higher Power to work through us than it cares about recognition and glory.
We have uncovered a self that cares more about principles than the exercise of our
individual personalities. Just as our disease is often expressed in self-centeredness, our
recovery is expressed beautifully as selfless service.

What is my attitude about sponsorship? Do I encourage my sponsees to make their own
decisions and grow as a result? Do I give advice, or do I share my experience?

What is my attitude about service? Could NA survive without me?

How am I practicing the principle of selflessness in my efforts to be of service?
Practicing the principle of steadfastness means we need to keep on trying to do our best.
Even if we've had a setback and fallen short of our own expectations, we need to
recommit ourselves to recovery. Steadfastness keeps a bad morning or a bad day from
turning into a pattern that can lead to our relapse. This commitment ensures that we will
keep practicing the principles of our program despite how we feel. Whether we're happy
about it, bored with it, disgusted by it, or completely frustrated over it, we keep on trying
to work a program.

Am I committed to my recovery? What am I doing to maintain it?

Do I practice spiritual principles regardless of how I feel?
Moving On
Before we get too excited about the prospect of being finished with the Twelve Steps, we
should realize that we're not-finished, that is. Not only will we continue trying to practice
the spiritual principles of all Twelve Steps, which many of us call "living the program,"
but we will formally revisit each of the steps, probably many times, throughout our lives.
Some of us may immediately begin working through the steps again with the perspective
that we've gained from our journey thus far. Others wait for a time or concentrate on
certain aspects of the steps. However we do it, the point is that whenever we find
ourselves powerless over our addiction, whenever more has been revealed about our
shortcomings or people we've harmed, the steps are available as our path to recovery.
We should feel good about what we've done. We have, in many cases for the first time,
followed a process all the way through. This is an amazing accomplishment, something
about which we should be very proud. In fact, one of the rewards of working an NA
program is finding that our self-esteem has grown a great deal.
We find ourselves joining society. We can do things that seemed beyond us before:
exchanging hellos with a neighbor or the clerk at our local market, taking on positions of
leadership in our communities, joining in social events with people who don't know we're
addicts and not feeling "less than." In fact, we may have looked with contempt upon such
things in the past because we felt we'd never be able to fit in, but now we know we can.
We become approachable. People may even seek out our advice and counsel on
professional matters.
When we think about where we've come from and what our recovery has brought to our
lives; we can only be overwhelmed with gratitude. As it says in It Works, gratitude
becomes the underlying force in all that we do. Our very lives can be an expression of our
gratitude; it all depends on how we choose to live. Each one of us has something very
special and unique to offer in gratitude.

How will I express my gratitude?